How Much Do You Know About These Presidents?
Let’s face it: 99 percent of any politician’s success relies on his or her capacity to successfully hide his or her true personality from the public. They’re not celebrities; they have to keep up with some standards!
While we all have our own flaws, failures, and weaknesses, a president’s job is to work hard at crafting a very specific public persona that will soothe and calm the hearts of the population with its dignity and calmness.
Or at least that’s what is supposed to happen in theory. And every time we get a glimpse of how they really are in reality, we are beyond shocked. Given all this, here are some of the weirdest facts about American presidents that they never mention in history classes.
Lyndon Johnson was a dong-waving s*x machine.
Lyndon B. Johnson became President of the United States after the tragic assassination of John F. Kennedy. Nowadays, everybody knows him as the president who made Vietnam happen (as he is the one who really escalated the conflict). Believe it or not, he wasn’t extremely popular, and he had his fair share of scandals.
However, at the time, he did have a great reputation for getting things done. When he really put his mind to something and wanted it passed, he would usually badger everybody to get it. In fact, some people used to call his relentless lobbying “The Johnson Treatment.”
And trust me, after reading this, you will picture something completely different anytime someone threatens you with “the Johnson Treatment.” And it’s something way worse than you can imagine. As it turns out, Johnson was no less than a se*ual beast.
While other unfaithful presidents were more than satisfied with an affair every now and then, Johnson’s appetite was apparently bigger. In fact, some of his male aids used to refer to his options as a harem. Moreover, if Johnson was in any way jealous of Kennedy, it wasn’t because of his political abilities or great decision-making.
Oh no, Johnson was jealous of how much of a womanizer Kennedy was. That’s probably one of the reasons why he would make passes at secretaries, and it was wildly known that if any of them accepted his advances, they would be promoted to private secretary, two words that in this particular context should probably have some subtitles anytime they are uttered.
By the time he was done, all his secretaries and his two mistresses had gotten the Johnson treatment. Moreover, he asked the Secret Service to help him get everything from his wife, but obviously not even the most secretive team in the country couldn’t keep this away from a woman’s nose.
His wife was fully aware of everything. In fact, at times, she even supported it. At parties, anytime he would make obvious passes at girls in front of his wife, she would ignore it.
Ulysses S. Grant was afraid of everything.
Ulysses S. Grant was the definition of American badassery—a hard-drinking bastard who, before becoming president, was responsible for more than half of the Union victories in the Civil War. However, few people know that before that, Grant also showed extremely heavy baldness in the Mexican-American War, especially when he voluntarily rode his horse down a sniper-filled street just for the sake of it.
Then, he gently and calmly smoked cigars as everyone was scared shitless and being bombarded by artillery shells. However, what you didn’t know is that he was truly nothing but a big softie. For instance, even though he showcased the best military experience and awesome battlefield tactics, he often freaked out at the sight of blood.
It was so bad that even rare steaks would creep him out. He was so shy that he couldn’t change or even shower in front of other men. And remember, they were at war. Officers are oftentimes bathed by stripping them and having other men pour water on them. Well, everybody except for Grant, who would rather hide in his tent.
Gerald Ford was a male fashion model.
Some of us know Gerald Ford as the clownish and doofus president that Chevy Chase made fun of in old-school Saturday Night Live episodes. Well, before that, he was known for being probably the first president in U.S. history who got the job by doing absolutely nothing.
But that’s not everything! He was appointed vice president because of one scandal and then made president because of another scandal. Then, he made the controversial decision to excuse Richard Nixon, and that’s how he went down in history as the goofball who stumbled through a very short and accidental presidency. However, what you definitely don’t know about him is that before being Gerald Ford, he was Derek Zoolander.
Yes, you’ve heard that right; he was a male model and even owned his own modeling agency. And he was big enough to make it onto the cover of Cosmopolitan! When he was in his 20s, he was modeling part-time for an agency owned by John Robert Powers, who went on to become quite famous.
During Ford’s time there, he rapidly became roomies with Harry Conover, who was also modeling. Conover decided to start his own modeling agency, but he didn’t have the money. And that’s how Ford chipped in $1,000 and became the silent partner of the new Harry Conver Agency!
Thomas Jefferson couldn’t speak in public.
While we know him as the main author of the Declaration of Independence and also one of the most influential of the Founding Fathers, Thomas Jefferson was so much more than that. First, he was incredibly good at writing stuff.
But he also designed great houses with swivel chairs and automatic doors. He even invented the portable printing press. Besides, he also founded the University of Virginia, just because he was able to.
In fact, JFK famously said at one point that the combined capacities of 49 Nobel Prize winners couldn’t really compare to the brainpower of Thomas Jefferson. But what not many people know about him is that he was a terrible public speaker.
He wasn’t charismatic or eloquent, and he was pretty much a walking cloud of stage fright. Some historians even think he dealt with a stuttering problem. If you want to know more about him, we recommend you listen to the audiobook “Thomas Jefferson: The Art of Power“, by Jon Meacham and Edward Herrmann.
John Quincy Adams was a bit crazy.
John Quincy Adams was the son of the second U.S. president, John Adams, so they were basically the predecessors of the Bush family, in a way. He was well-known as one of the best diplomats ever. Before becoming president, he played an instrumental role in the acquisition of Florida under President James Monroe.
Moreover, he had a big part in writing the Monroe Doctrine, which was no less than a ballsy declaration that told Europe to fuck off. As president, he was a vocal opponent of slavery and supported education advancement, which would make anyone think that his failure to get re-elected was due to the fact that he was too smart.
As smart as he was, he was still a bit cuckoo. You see, John Quincy Adams thought the earth was hollow. He even greenlighted an expedition to prove it.
If you’re eager to read other similar articles, then you definitely need to check out this one: 10 Dumbest Political Statements You’ll Find Hard to Believe
